Opening Doorz

By Martin D’Souza | Opening Doorz Editorial | June 15, 2018

Rating: 1.5 / 5

The essence: Since the plot is weak and you cannot hold the audience’s attention with mid-air pyrotechnics all the time, Director Remo D’Souza shuffles to his specialty (dance choreography) and throws in elaborate songs a la Himmesh Reshammiya’s music videos. When that too doesn’t work, he moves to Cambodia to sneak off a hard disk from a bank’s locker.

Race, March 2008: Ranvir Singh (Saif Ali Khan) and Rajiv (Akshaye Khanna) are two half-brothers who own a huge stud farm in Durban, South Africa. Horseracing is Ranvir’s favourite pastime besides his other business interests which are not mentioned. Rajiv, the younger brother likes the smell of alcohol. Embittered because the entire estate is in his elder brother’s name, he hatches a plan to kill him and claim the insurance money apart from the other businesses. He ropes in Sonia Martin (Bipasha Basu) for this heinous crime. However, it turns out that Bipasha was already roped in by Ranvir. Anil Kapoor is detective Robert D’Costa better known as RD…

Race 2, January 2013: No flashback to Rajiv (Akshaye Khanna) here. Anil Kapoor is carried over with a ‘fruity’ Ameesha Patel aptly called Cherry! Ranvir (Saif) is out to avenge Sonia’s death. The players now are Ranvir, Armaan Malik (John Abraham), his sister Elena (Deepika Padukone) and Omisha (Jacqueline Fernandez). If you have not seen Race, you will not know that Anil Kapoor is an inspector. From Durban to Turkey, where this film has been set, he certainly has come a long way!

Race 3, June 15, 2018: Forget Race and Race 2: This film is a sequel but there is no connection to the previous plot or the cast. This is a completely new plot; a new race, with a sub-plot to convolute the already existing [new] plot. Anil Kapoor is not RD; there is no Ranvir either. In fact there is also no Omisha (Jacqueline Fernandez): she is recast here as Jessica, with no connection to Omisha! There’s no Abbas-Mastan either; somewhere along the line (between 2013 and 2018, they lost the Race). In steps Remo D’Souza, dance choreographer and director.

Race 3 is all about Shamsher Singh (Anil Kapoor) and his family who are based in Abu Dhabi. Shamsher has two kids of his own besides his dead brother’s son. His two kids are Suraj (Saqib Saleem) and Sanjana (Daisy Shah). His brother’s son is Sikander (Salman Khan). All three kids are from the same mother. You see, Shamsher, like a conscientious villager (he comes from a village called Handiya), marries his brother’s wife and sires two kids, after he flees his village when his business rivals close in on him. There is also Yash (Bobby Deol) who works with them and Raghu (Sharat Saxena) Shamsher’s Man Friday. This is the basic plot, which then has so many twists and turns that in the end you wonder what Remo will hit you with next.

Since the plot is weak and you cannot hold the audience’s attention with mid-air pyrotechnics all the time, Remo shuffles to his specialty (dance choreography) and throws in elaborate songs a la Himmesh Reshammiya’s music videos.

When that too doesn’t work, he moves to Cambodia to sneak off a hard disk from a bank’s locker. Luckily, there’s a night club close to the bank and it is connected by an underground drain system. This is used by the Singh clan to whisk off the hard disk while Jessica and Sikander Sing at the club.

The disk has escapades of Indian politicians who were captured in a hotel in Manali brought to the notice of Shamsher by his friend from the village, Birju (Rajesh Sharma) who has access to the password which is finger-print protected. Shamsher wants to blackmail the politicians since he wants to return to his village.

There are also the two female leads who alternate between kung-fu and kabaddi after one of them (Jessica) has shown off her dimples on her thighs. And before Salman can tear off his shirt in the last scene, it is Bobby Deol who bares his freshly-toned gym body. Of course, Salman rips off his tee too. It’s now dangal in the desert sand!

One guy wants to do his “Mata Pita ka raksha”, while the other wants his “Mata Pita ka badla.” I won’t tell you much, I have already revealed a lot. The acting department has nothing to offer: Saqib keeps mouthing “Bro”, Salman speaks his few lines in English faster than Jackie Chan’s fist moves, Daisy and Jacqueline both look good on screen. For me it is only Sharat Saxena who dignifies his role and performance just by his sheer presence and the few lines he is allowed to speak.

The action by Allan Amin in Race in 2008 was pulsating, ditto Race 2 (2013) by Peter Heins. Here, it is just mid-air flying and cars exploding (Rohit Shetty style). What happens to the Indian politicians who fly out to Abhu Dhabi to negotiate a deal with Shamsher to get the video, no one knows!

It’s Eid, festival time, and also Salman Khan time: A feast for his fans, I guess.

CREDITS
Producer: Ramesh Taurani, Salma Khan
Director: Remo D’Souza
Star Cast: Salman Khan, Anil Kapoor, Daisy Shah, Jacqueline Fernandez, Saqib Saleem, Sharat Saxena