Opening Doorz

By Martin D’Souza | Opening Doorz Editorial | November 14, 2024

The year is roughly around 1979. My Mum, Margaret D’Souza, was a constant visitor at Michael House. That’s two lanes after Jagmohandas Building where I resided earlier.

A Serendipitous Meeting, A Lifelong Connection

Being the youngest among four siblings, I had the honour of being taken around wherever my Mum went. At Michael House, I distinctly remember one day when she inquired with her friend about her son who was studying to be a priest. I was just 12 years old then, but in the quiet evening of that time, this moment still stands out for me. Stands out because at that time, my Mum did not tell me anything about this friend of hers nor did she speak about the boy who would be priest.

Three years later, when my Mum dropped me to the Apostolate at Don Bosco, Lonavala, in my second year, she walked into the Prefect of Studies office and greeted a young priest, hugging him, saying, “Baba. How are you?” I was shocked by this greeting, wondering how my Mum knew Fr. Olympio D’Mello.

After we came out of the office I asked her how she knew him and then she reminded me about our visits to Michael House and her friend.

We (My Mum and me) would often meet Maria D’Mello, either on the way to Church, or to the fish market. Yes, I was a constant visitor there too!

Maria D’Mello passed away yesterday, in Canada. She was 95.

A Spiritual Bond, Forged in Faith

Olympio D’Mello, who now resides in North Carolina, USA, messaged me two days ago, “Angie and I rushed to Toronto. My mother is in the hospital in her last days. Please say a prayer.”

We kept in touch, with Oly giving me updates on his mother’s health. “She’s still hanging on… There is nothing more that the doctors can do for her. She is in a coma-like situation.”

Having been in a similar situation I wrote back: “It must be tough on you all to see her like this. Try and spend some time speaking with her. I did the mistake of running away from the ICU when my Mum was in coma in 2005. I could not bear to see her like that. Years later, I realised I should have sat there, held her hand, and spoken with her.”

A Message Across Time

“That’s how I felt too,” Oly wrote back. “Fortunately, I have an empathetic wife who has taught me how to handle this. I sit by her side and whisper in her ear that I love her.”

My immediate reaction to what I could not do, was, “Praise God. How I wish I had that courage. Tell her she has fought the good fight, won the race and that a crown awaits her on the other side. She will be a powerful intercessor for you all.”

Being a little ambitious, and wanting to send a message across, I asked Oly a favour. “Please also tell her, if possible, to say hello to Margaret, my Mum, her good friend. Tell her I said sorry I did not speak with her in her last two days. I was terribly heartbroken to see her in that state.”

“I whispered that to her,” Oly wrote back. Forty-four minutes after that message he informed me that his mother passed away peacefully. “She has joined her good friend, Margaret!”

My Mother Margaret would have been 92 on November 6.

A Flawed Beginning

Fr. Olympio and I never hit it off in Lonavala although our mothers were friends. In fact, our relationship was just the opposite.

I remember one distinct incident where he said something nasty to me. His parents were visiting the Boarding during that time, and his Dad, who also knew me, was aghast. This was on the top pitch. He simply told his son, “Is that the way you speak to him?” He stopped short of asking his son, a Priest at that time, to apologise to me.

I don’t think Oly remembers this, but incidents like these leave a mark on you, especially when you are far away from home… all alone. Thankfully, this never festered and I was able to move on.

Beyond Coincidence: A Connection That Lives On

So why am I reliving all this? 

Because today, I share a strong bond with Oly and his wife Angie, a bond that has its roots in Maria and Margaret being friends, a bond that rekindled around 12 years ago when the Don Bosco Lonavala batch of 1983 regrouped on WhatsApp.

Spiritually, we have connected, sharing our insights on the Word. It is always enlightening and exciting for me when there is an in-depth discussion on the Word. And Oly, having been a Priest earlier, has a different insight from the other side. On the worldly level too, we have connected.

Maria and Margaret began a friendship ages ago, not knowing that one day their sons, almost 16 years apart, would forge a strong bond. And that this friendship would stretch all the way to eternity.

I do not believe that it is coincidence that I got an opportunity to do what I could not, through Oly.

I have long ago learnt that Coincidence is God’s way of staying Anonymous.

The bond between Maria and Margaret continues beyond…

[Moody Marty: Sometimes funny, sometimes informative, always downright forthright!]

Also Read: Celebrating Life With Our Mother Margaret

Also Read: Olympio D’Mello: A Journey of Faith, Family, and Fulfillment