Opening Doorz

By Marcellus Baptista | Opening Doorz Editorial | September 20, 2019

The Mumbai weather at the moment, everyone would agree, is baffling. So to clear my mind if not my wet house, I decided to consult the weather bureau official.

“Already more than half-month of September is over and we still have rains. When will the monsoon withdraw? They said that in the beginning of this month the monsoon should have retreated, what is happening now?” I asked the expert official.

“The monsoon has retreated already,” he said, opening and shutting an umbrella.

“What! Everyone is stuck in the rains and the traffic is crawling and you say there are no rains,” I said.

“I didn’t say there were no rains, only that the monsoon is no longer around,” he said. “For what you are now experiencing is the pre-monsoon showers of 2020.”

“Surely you are not serious; how can pre-monsoon arrive almost a year before the actual monsoon?”

“The weather may seem unpredictable to the common man but we have sophisticated instruments and ways to gauge the monsoon conditions,” he said. “We have come to the conclusion that the monsoon had retreated in the first week of September but what you are now experiencing is the first pre-showers of 2020.”

“This is getting very complicated, should we carry an umbrella and wear a raincoat this year for next year’s rains?” I asked.

“The choice is yours, we only inform the public about the weather conditions,” he said. “It is not our job to advise you what to wear and what to carry for these wet and damp conditions.”

“Okay, okay, I get it,” I said. “Actually, I’m not sure whether I get this weather report. But one more thing I would like to know, will it be raining or dry in October?”

“You will experience October heat,” said the weather bureau official. “But please note; this is the pre-October heat of 2020.”

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